it doesn't make a diff

Hum... guess that no one really cares... whether you are around or not... it will jus be the same. i'll be there doing my own stuff... learning my own things... think i really kind of give up... wat i wan isn't jus abt playing alone, if that's wat i wan, mus well go yamaha and learn. i have been lowering mself so much so much... time taken was too long... wasted half a year... half a year of my time there's alot i can do. well... there is people who can play well there, there is people hu is willing to teach... admit that i'm kind of unwillingly... cos wat i do? sit there... teach them watch them... wat else? wat i gain... nothing.. at the end of the day.. jus tired (go home slp better, got people to replace mi)...
if people cant clicked well, tat person dies off... even if he tried his best to stay, it doesn't make a point also, cos it doesn't belong to there at first. it jus like north pole animal moving to the equator and staying with the animal there, the end result is dying there. i lost my good frenz there... should go back to where i belong....
hai... went for wind sym meeting today... well lots more intesting and challenging things coming up... i dun understand why the yr three can do so much in wind sym and why not the yr 3 in genre? the people are the same, from the same couse and so on...only 3 of the yr three hanging there and pushing the whole band, i really appreciate them alot alot... i really have no idea... wat will happen next time when the new com takes over? will they be the same as them? for mi i think they really do very well, i guess i couldn't be as good as them but i'm willing to try. and they did a good job, i will feel guilty if i dun. maybe they are e first batch and they went through alot... and the years 2 went through hard time with them too... and those days were memorable... laughter, work, though there is complaing and getting angry with each other... but then, we get over it after we vent out. people leaves and comes... well... i'm happy that i've met them... but it's kind of sad when the people are close to us left... if only all of them stay, that would be great... and i'm really glad that those who are still here stay on... they make us looks like a band at least... Daniel, you really did a great job by maintaning all those instrument in shape.. haha... sad that jy left u alone... Knoe it's hard to maintain both study and band and do well in both. we decide for our own things... if choose to pick up then you have to maintain it, got to learn, and adapt to it. if you want it then organise it... if cannot take it den too bad it's when people leave... we can't blame them too.. it's a personnal things, cant be done by forcing. not sure why i talk about all this but hum... type and type and type... that's how it goes...
maybe last sem it's really tough for mi.. and i kind of able to manage it this sem... though i say i wanted a week break from both the Igs... but i went to band... i dun feel stress, though i feel tired, at least we can c that everyone play their part by learning their own part and makes us sound like band. though some of the pieces still sounded bad... guess we can make it rite... yeah...
yesterday actually dun wan to go for band, i was at the bus stop goin to board the bus, lucky the bus is not 111... whaha... i feel really bad when pei xuan say she's not going... and that's when daniel call mi... lol... in the end headed back to sch... well i didn't regret abt it. cos it's fun there and realise that big event coming out in ws... so perhap next time i wouldn't mention about not going to band... whaha, unless i really really very tired, and no time to study for ut... went to eat with hannah and theodore at mos... had my corn soup and bought a pair of ladies shoe... lol...