Sunday, January 22, 2006

Hum... jus realise that i had been sick for 3 times in 4 months.
not jus normal kind of sickness, first time was very very serious, then the other time was having flu, now having sore throat at first, then flu + cough... have been sick since rp open house second day... till now.. not recover yet... how sia..

Friday, January 20, 2006

I'm Sick le...

Flu... sore throat... it seems getting worse rather then better... hai...

Sunday, January 15, 2006

i really can feel how ying2 felt.. haha... she is now over the moon le...

wow.. i feel so happy for u.. after so long, and you finally gets what you want... must treasure ok... good lucks to you guys.
cannot concentrate so much on other side and neglect study ok..
why god alway gave mi surprises that is so unpredictable, and when i'm totally unprepared for it... human nv understand god's thinking...
it's alway when i'd given up my hope upon somethings, i given up my hope becos i had tried hard enough and to no avail, then that something that i hope for, came so sudden that i couldn't believe it and unable to take that shock.

It's good that i actually get part of the things i wan...

Hai...

it hurt me... it nv going to be the same again... once it changes, second, third times and so on will changes forever n ever...


__________________________________

two person said to me that...

i commit myself too much on other stuff and neglect them, do i really?

i tried to commit myself to every things that i loved, however i need to priortize which one come first, it alway happen like this, so that when it's time for me to choose i can decide fast and wouldn't be that terrible...
In life the most difficult things to learnt is to give up, and learnt to accept it. in which ever aspect of life, giving up comes in very often... hai...
it's not time to give up yet, however i hope no force come into me, i dun like being force, as i will act without thinking...

I saw a book name 'why customer do they thing they do?'. is quite interesting... haha same as why i wan to do the things i do?
i do things with reason(s), rarely i do without reason.
Now, i'm learning to accept what people wants, i won't force anymore. you want to do this rite go ahead then, i wun do things to change ur mind, i tried too hard getting the things i wan, and i end up each time with sadness. Many time i almost tears, especially someone who i have high hope on... tot that they wouldn't upset mi, but in the end, they wan their way still. ok i respect you by giving you wat you wan. jus hoping that, they still respect me by doing at least 1/3 of wat i ask for, i'll be glad.
i understand dat not everyone is alike, and they don't think alike. jus give and takes.
if i wan it the way i wan, and people jus dun agree to it, it either i give in or i do all the things... that's the way... if the things must go like this, and no one willing to work, well i take all the job then, i guess this is wat many people need to learnt... and it's the hardest amoung all.. cos not everyone wans to take everything, usually they just give up...
for me choosing to give up, is my very very last resort. cos i hate failure, regrets, and nv even try it but choose to give up...



i think i should go learnt psychology instead of science haha..

Sunday, January 08, 2006

my uncle pass away... jus got a message from my dad..
it's so sudden.. life is so unpredictable... e last time i saw him was like last CNY, dun even noe i saw him or not... hai... maybe even before CNY which was when my grandma pass away... i still remember it well. it's on april fool, jus before i enter my poly... so on every april fool i wun even think of making of fun of others cos it's ain't anything fun to me at all... last year grandma pass away for one yr le.. now three more month and it's going to be 2 yrs le.. life pass so fast i dun even remember it's one or two yr le...
as i grow older... i'm more afraid, not afraid of dying but afraid that my relative, grand parents and parents pass away. i dun wan that to happen... hai.. that's how life sucks.. when one by one left u... and eventually u left.. it's an non ending thing...

Friday, January 06, 2006

Feeling bad recently...

hai.. not sure why... haha.. i alway not sure de...
i feel that i'm perfectly normal, but i don't feel good at all...
it just weird that i dun feel like eating since sch start... i have no appetite at all. and it shouldn't happen to me... cos i love food alot... so much that i couldn't control myself not to eat... the only time i felt hungy is during morning when i just reach sch... then for the rest of the day i dun feel hungry at all, maybe i do feel hungry but i got no mood to eat too... hai...
am i under stress? or am i having depression? (not possible ba)
so far i only eat in sch for the three times (proper meal) inclusive of lunch and dinner... and i dun eat when i reach home lor... actually is ok la.. attended sch for e past three days only.. haha.. jus that one day i onli take one meal.. which is not very normal...

Have i given up everything and just wan to focus on study and band... if it is.. it's very serious...
is just equivalent to i'm crazy le...
what i know now is that my mind is very clear now... i noe what i wan to do, and what i should do... could i be focusing so much that i jus forgot about every other things...

Monday, January 02, 2006

Working at borders

Working on the first day of the year...

while... was quite slack in the morning... the crowd started coming in the afternoon and people keep coming in, queuing non stop, line getting longer...

at a point of time when there wasn't any queue...
a customer came in... telling mi a boy lost his mum... asked if i can help the boy... of cos i have to... i went over.. the boy kept crying and crying...
i asked what's his mum name... he cried.. trying again asking his name... again he cried.. i not sure wat to do lor... hahaha... feel very sad for him... the way he cried made mi wanted to cry to... luckily his maid saw him... so i dun really have to anything... hehe...

wonder wat will happen when i have children... the kid will alway cry de... haha... by that time, there will be someone to take care of kid in times like this ba.. lol... : p so let him take care ba...

Sunday, January 01, 2006

went to esplanade...

wanted to meet sherline and ming cong at esplanade there de... i went there after my work abt 10 plus... they were working till 1 am lor... anyway i went to find sherline.. but i couldn't find her... and very hard to reach her also.. hehe

as i walk on.. i'm feeling hungry.. and hungry, and very hungry.. so went to find food.. after i got my food le.. i try to call her again but cannot le.. cos i think got network prob.. however manage to get ming cong.. haha he was stuck at esplanade also.. while i was stuck beside a traffic light.. didnt wan to move cos either way there were too much people... the position where i was waiting for the fireworks was just nice (it's a nice spot to rest, not to catch a fireworks)... haha when it started... i could only c like half of the entire fireworks.. am happy enough la.. couldn't be bother to move around also.. too tired le.. haha

after it finished.. i was thinking whether i should move or stay there.. not sure why i just sat there for quite sometime that i decided to move.. at first tot of taking bac home.. anyway i wasn't thinking when i started walking... all i could care abt is get to the mrt and decide later... hahah.. while it wasn't that bad.. still got more then enough space for mi to stand... haha anyway it is only a few stops... hehe...

anybody i saw... yep... my fren's bro.. haha.. that's it.. haha.. so tired.. going to get a quick bath and go slp le.. later working in the morning. got to wake up at 6 30 like dat.. haha

Happy New Year...

my new year resolution...
last few nights i think of alot.. but now i all forgot le.. haha...